Moving, again.

The nomadic serial blogger strikes again.

New adress: http://hauntologie.blogspot.com/

Cheers

Friday Poetry

Friday poetry blogging is something I’ve always wanted to do. The problem is, I never realise it’s Friday until the following Tuesday or Wednesday. But since I am sitting in Starbuck’s working on my thesis while the rest of the world is out relaxing or getting wasted, I am painfully aware that it is indeed Friday.

And so a poem — one of my favorites by Rainer Maria Rilke. (The last two stanzas are amazing.)

WOMAN IN LOVE

That is my window. Just now
I have so softly wakened.
I thought that I would float.
How far does my life reach,
and where does the night begin

I could think that everything
was still me all around;
transparent like a crystal’s
depths, darkened, mute.

I could keep even the stars
within me; so immense
my heart seems to me; so willingly
it let him go again.

whom I began perhaps to love, perhaps to hold.
Like something strange, undreamt-of,
my fate now gazes at me.

For what, then, am I stretched out
beneath this endlessness,
exuding fragrance like a meadow,
swayed this way and that,

calling out and frightened
that someone will hear the call,
and destined to disappear
inside some other life.

Translated by Edward Snow

Playing It Cool

I’m only writing because I have the nearly uncontrollable urge to call J.  It’s because I’m at Starbucks working on my thesis and we used to do work together here, and this is the first time I’ve been here since last spring, with him.  I want to get a mocha, his drink.  I want to tell him I miss him.  Now they’re playing the Donnie Darko soundtrack and it isn’t helping.  He loves that stupid movie.

We talked for an hour today.  He’d been trying to get a hold of me for a couple days but I was always in class or something.  I didn’t call back; I played it cool.  He told me he misses me.  I said it was good to hear him.  He didn’t say anything about his mistress.  I don’t know what to think.  I was almost ready to move on and forget everything.

But I’m not gonna do it.  I’m doing so good.  It’s like a diet: I’m doing so good and I’m not gonna fuck up.  I’m not gonna call or text or email.  I’m cool…. I’m playin’ it cool…